Berkeley Burning

Squatters, low-lives, fucking millennial generation. The whole place had gone up in flames. Hellfire paradise burned back up to the heavens. The entire warehouse was a sparking pyrotechnic nightmare. Daisy chained extension cords connected together weaving in and out of crumbling rooms. One room a mausoleum of discarded luggage piled high on both sides, theContinue reading “Berkeley Burning”

The Frog and the Banshee

Spilled engineered energy drinks evaporated on the ground as the citric fumes caused purple cataracts of chemical intoxication. The mouths of the crowd unhinged viperous as a cacophony of cheers swirled above their heads accumulating into a foreboding fog. The billowed haze consumed the energy of the crowd as it formed its own teeth andContinue reading “The Frog and the Banshee”

I am not Late

I was late today because I was on the phone with my sister planning a two week trip around Europe. We haven’t seen each other in four months. Way too long considering we lived an hour away from each other, more like ten states, or two vodka shots, or one broken jeep and a trenchContinue reading “I am not Late”

Who are the People that would Believe Me?

Who are the people that tell you yes? Who are the people that tell you no? Who are the people that tell you to be? Who are the people that tell you to be anything but? Who are the people that make you? Break you? Throw you? Lift you? Who are the people that areContinue reading “Who are the People that would Believe Me?”

To the Handyman who Fixed the Kallax Shelf I “Built”

Firstly, I would like to say thank you. Secondly, I had read the instructions and no such piece or part came with the furniture Third, you have laced silk underwear, much better than the plumbers in America, whereever did you buy them? Fourth, your eyes are penetratingly blue, and I do not like them. EspeciallyContinue reading “To the Handyman who Fixed the Kallax Shelf I “Built””

Psychopathic Passive Aggressive Notes to Myself

Two socks, neither are mine. Your fridge approached me the other day. It was an unwelcome advance. You conduct an abnormal amount of static electricity. I am quite tired of your electrical current. Where did you put the key to that memory? Fuck you brain for phantom pain! I see that you have failed toContinue reading “Psychopathic Passive Aggressive Notes to Myself”