It seems that you have stumbled upon this site, for which I have no answer as to why you are here. All I have for you are more questions. Questions upon questions upon questions. So, if you don’t want to think, or you expect some kind of answer, then run little one. Run very quickly away. For this is not the place for you, and you have stumbled into an ever expanding mind with no foreseeable exit.
Hallo, sind sie Türkisch?
Ich bin nicht Türkisch.
Naja? Aber woher kommen sie? Nicht Türkei?
[Where do I come from?]
Nein. Ich bin nicht Türkisch. Ich bin eine Amerikanerin.
“Nie, das ist unmöglich. Woher kommen sie? Ihren Familienstadt?”
[Family city? Well most of my mom’s family’s from Cleveland, and my father lives in San Diego. Or is this one of those “official” words you see on documents? Is he asking for my billing zip code? Is he trying to figure out where I live?]
“Versteh mir nicht.”
[No. Shit. Or would that be “nein Scheisse”? Nicht Scheisse? Kein Scheisse? Is there a German equivalent?]
Ihr Vati und Mutti, woher kommen sie? Ihr Nachname?
[Da fuck! Now he wants to know about the genealogy of my last name. What is this guy getting at? Okay, respond in the most elegant way possible]
Ihren Augen sind gross und braun und ihre Nase ist wie ein Berg.
[Berg? Like hamburger? Shit, I know this word. Castle? No that’s Schloss. Wall? No that’s Mauer or Wand or whatever. Berg? What the hell is “Berg”? Like iceberg, like a mountain. Son of a bitch! Did he just say my nose is like a fucking mountain?]
Mein Nase ist wie was?
“Berg, berg, gross, “zig-zag/crooked,” aber ein bisschen hübsch.”
[Is this really happening?]
Was hast du gesagt?
[Oh shit! I just switched to informal.
This dude’s gunna think his horrendous attempt at flirting is working.]
“Naja und dein Baum -”
[Now he’s using the informal. There’s no going back to the formal forms now.
Why is he still talking? Could this get worse?]
Meine Muttie würde mich nie mit einer türkische Frau ausgehen lassen, aber deine exotischen Lippen ….
[Oh yeah it’s getting worse. Sift through your little A-2 brain dictionary. Come on, come on, oh thank goodness my stop is coming up. Now’s my chance to lay it on him! To tell him off, to educate this man on the historical context for which such terms were created in order to oppress people based on their citizenship, gender, ethnicity, socioeconomic status, okay you got this, you got this, stop’s right here. Now use that repertoire of language to educate this man and shut him the fuck up. You got this A-2.]
Nicht jeder mit braunen Augen ist Türkisch.
Nicht jeder, der anders aussieht ist Türkisch.
Nicht jeder mit einer großen Nase ist Türkisch.
Und Ich, ich bin nicht Türkisch.
du bist ein Arsch.
- Select character
- You have selected — U8
- U8 has engaged in a fight
- *Battle Music Initiated* U8 versus Hausverwaltung
- U8 has become intoxicated
- U8 is too intoxicated to fight
- Hausverwaltung attacks with increased rent
- U8 has become unresponsive to battle commands
- Hausverwaltung attacks with “Noise Complaint: Final Notice.”
- U8 is severely injured.
- Select Character>#27 Medic Class
- Fight>Medic Class is unable to fight
- Heal! U8 is intoxicated and ignores “Heal”
- U8 use>item>Berghain Entry Stamp
- U8 uses combination EDM and Berghain Entry Stamp. Causes area effect. #27 and U8 ignore commands.
- Select character>S41 & S42: The Twins
- ***long silence*** Where are they?
- Summon>Night Bus 50!
- Night Bus 50 will arrive next turn!
- Hausverwaltung summons U6. Combined attack “Fine Print Loophole & Tourists.”
- #27 has been knocked unconscious. Combined attack missed U8.
- You are unable to flee. Hausverwaltung uses “Contract.”
- You are unable to flee. Hausverwaltung uses “3 Month Notice.”
- Nightbus 50 has arrived! You have successfully fled the Ringbahn arena!
I just got published yesterday in honor of Germany’s Reunification Day!!! WHIIIIICH also marked my one year anniversary of living in Berlin. Holy Crap!!! I am so lucky and blessed. Check out my piece here!!!
We memorize Wi-Fi passwords
like our parents memorized phone numbers
of post-coitus sighs
from fur quake
exhaling soft rings.
Cellulite stretches and
a mole marked majora
of a stretched perineum
and receding scrotum
curling behind terse
My time touched lover,
we are orgasms in stillness.
I have learned this,
I am educated,
it must be fact.
cold, warm, iced, or far above the legally consumable limit
served sweet, bitter, and/or a little milky
(maybe very milky)
fat-whole-soy-a little bit of skim
add a little bit of flavor
and stir the stick
swirl the spoon
watch as it slips beneath the surface
the precision of gingerly lapping
at the freezing burn
fingering beneath the miniscus
Linked and laughing
cackle thunder clap
you kaleidoscopic rash coaster