Excerpt from “Nightschool”

Check out the full performance here: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wHZqcU6ciiQ

Mama never said I was pretty growing up

She said it was cuz 

She didn’t want it to be my 

Only feature

So I believed to be ugly

And when my breasts grew full

And my knees ached from the weight of them

I was called a tomboy

Flooded with hormones, aggression, and hairy pits,

And became the Beast from the Middle East

So I believed to be ugly

Until the two towers  fell

While walking down glass corridor halls

And the Christian Youth had found their new crusade

And I believed to be hated.

But all these things I had believed to be

Had become disillusionments 

in my 20’s

My mind ravaged by a man

As my faith was raped by the system

Body buried beneath forms x, 1040, and C

While tinnitus buzzed in the left

A feeling about being reminded of something

Someone I had once believed to be

But I could not think of self

While trying to survive

Learning self-inoculation against

The gravity of global virolity

The fury of each new pain 

Remembers caliced conquests

lessening the intensity

Now

I am believed

to be learned, experienced, pseudo-spiritual

Searching to satiate the thirst of

A fluid life

And yet,

I do not know 

What I believe.

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